Episode One:
Fish Out of Water
There are many things that make a cat’s life wonderful, even if you’re stuck indoors all day. A cat can do just about anything he wants. When I want attention, I snuggle with my family. There’s a young girl, Abigail, who’s six and loves to snuggle with me and pet me and stroke my neck with her tiny fingers.
When I don’t want attention, it’s easy to slink off and hide behind the couch or on top of the cabinets. It’s a great view from the top of the cabinets. I just wish they’d dust more. Don’t they realize somebody actually does see the top of cabinets?
Overall, I like my home. There’s a lot to do. Like climbing curtains. Typically it’s best when they're not home. Abigail will never rat me out. She thinks it's funny. But her parents don’t, and they pull me off the curtains and tell me what a bad kitty I am. That’s a situation in which my claws come in handy. I use them occasionally on Mom and Dad, although I really try to not use them on Abigail if I can help it. I don’t want her to be afraid of me.
I also love licking chips (those cheesy Doritos are my favs) and watching TV. The TV is incredible. I watch people running through the forest and huge cats jumping out of the brambles to chase surprised gazelles and antelope. They’re always on the hunt, and I know I’m a cat too. I’m tough and could also chase down and eat an antelope. My family even agrees. They give me cat food that says ‘Wild’ on the can. Sometimes when Abigail picks me up I don’t feel very big and tough, but I know I am. They call me Tiger, after all!
Today, Dad came home with a surprise. He kissed Mom and then set something large and round on the counter. It seemed to be filled with water.
“Come here, little Tiger,” he called, making kissy noises. Curious, but a little nervous, I leapt up onto the counter.
It was a circular jar with something small and orange floating inside.
“See?” Dad said. “Do you like the fishy?” I didn’t know what a fishy was, but it didn’t look like anything particularly interesting. I moved a little closer to try to sniff the new strange object. I wished Abigail was here. She’d probably ask what a fishy was, and Dad and Mom would answer her. They never seem to answer me.
I can say, “Hey, my litter stinks and needs a change,” and they’ll think I’m saying, “I’m hungry,” or “please feed me”. Or they’ll say, “Awe, I think Tiger wants a back stroke”. Nope, I want you to move that stinky poo out of my litter. Your poo doesn’t hang around in the litter box to greet you the next time, does it?
“Awe,” Dad said to Mom. “Look, Tiger’s curious. He likes the fishy. Go ahead and play with it.”
“Jerod,” Mom said, looking half reproachful. “Don’t tell him to play with it. That’s not nice.”
“It’s what he’d do in the wild, isn’t it?”
“I’m not sure if cats play with fish. I think you’re thinking of bears.”
“Well, bears eat fish… hmm…” Dad said, looking a little less certain.
Suddenly, the orange mass in the jar moved. It actually MOVED.
I backed away. Ew, ew, ew. It moves!
“Come on, little Tiger,” Dad said in a ridiculous baby voice. “Come on and play with the fishy. But don’t eat the fishy.”
Woah, ew. So he actually got me this weird floating mass of orange and thinks I’d eat it. The thing is literally floating in the water. It has black magic written all over it. What floats in the air? Nothing!
Dad stroked my back, which felt good, and I arched my back into his hand. But seriously. No amount of cat bribing or cajoling was going to get me anywhere near this fishy thing. I cautiously raised my paw above the water to appease him and to hopefully swat the thing silly if it tried to come close to the surface, but it didn't. After a moment, I lowered my paw and tried to slink off.
Dad laughed. “Ha, I guess Tiger’s not interested in her. Crazy, I thought the cat would be all over the fish.”
Mom laughed. “Ah well.”
Really. Couldn’t they have figured this out before he got the black magic wielding floating monster?
I was about to go lay down in the sunny spot on the floor when I froze.
“Psss….” A soft voice was calling and I knew it wasn’t either Mom or Dad.
Slowly, incredibly slowly to not freak myself out any more than I already was, I turned toward the fish bowl. Now that Mom and Dad were not paying attention, the fish had stopped swimming aimlessly and was against the end of the glass staring directly at me.
“Pss… I’m not scary. And I’m not magical. If I was, do you think I’d be in this jar?”
My ears perked up slightly. Probably not, but maybe she was using black magic to make me think that!...
“Can you come closer, please? I have a very loud voice, but I’m about one-hundredth the size of you so it's really straining to yell.”
Was it a trap? I flexed my claws against the carpet, which stuck like Velcro, and then made the mistake of trying to walk toward the little fish and got stuck in place. I nearly fell on my face. I heard a soft tinkling noise and realized the fish was laughing, tiny bubbles emitting from her tiny mouth. Embarrassed, I walked closer and closer, still cautious. My tail twitched, probably a little fluffier than usual.
“How do I know you’re not magical?” I said.
“I can’t float outside of water,” the fish shot back. “And you could float in water if you tried. Have you ever tried?”
“Well, no…” The idea of spending even a second in water, let alone one’s whole life, seemed terrible. I started to feel bad for the fish. Poor thing. What type of monster did Dad think he was to trap her in water for all this time? I started to think of ways to knock the fishbowl onto the floor to watch it shatter. Maybe… I walked closer.
Suddenly, things seemed very different than they had when Dad first brought her in. The water made her look beautiful. She had little paper thin fins that seemed to glide and ripple effortlessly through nothing, and her side was a deep red gold made up of hundreds of little arched scales that changed colors slightly as she moved. My eyes grew wider and wider and I slowly, slowly brought my face closer to the glass, losing sight of everything other than the fish. It was beautiful, still a little strange, but pretty and unlike anything I’d ever seen. I think our noses touched. At least mine touched the glass, and I think hers did too.
“I'm Lily,” she said.
“Lily… I’m Tiger. Welcome home.”
When I don’t want attention, it’s easy to slink off and hide behind the couch or on top of the cabinets. It’s a great view from the top of the cabinets. I just wish they’d dust more. Don’t they realize somebody actually does see the top of cabinets?
Overall, I like my home. There’s a lot to do. Like climbing curtains. Typically it’s best when they're not home. Abigail will never rat me out. She thinks it's funny. But her parents don’t, and they pull me off the curtains and tell me what a bad kitty I am. That’s a situation in which my claws come in handy. I use them occasionally on Mom and Dad, although I really try to not use them on Abigail if I can help it. I don’t want her to be afraid of me.
I also love licking chips (those cheesy Doritos are my favs) and watching TV. The TV is incredible. I watch people running through the forest and huge cats jumping out of the brambles to chase surprised gazelles and antelope. They’re always on the hunt, and I know I’m a cat too. I’m tough and could also chase down and eat an antelope. My family even agrees. They give me cat food that says ‘Wild’ on the can. Sometimes when Abigail picks me up I don’t feel very big and tough, but I know I am. They call me Tiger, after all!
Today, Dad came home with a surprise. He kissed Mom and then set something large and round on the counter. It seemed to be filled with water.
“Come here, little Tiger,” he called, making kissy noises. Curious, but a little nervous, I leapt up onto the counter.
It was a circular jar with something small and orange floating inside.
“See?” Dad said. “Do you like the fishy?” I didn’t know what a fishy was, but it didn’t look like anything particularly interesting. I moved a little closer to try to sniff the new strange object. I wished Abigail was here. She’d probably ask what a fishy was, and Dad and Mom would answer her. They never seem to answer me.
I can say, “Hey, my litter stinks and needs a change,” and they’ll think I’m saying, “I’m hungry,” or “please feed me”. Or they’ll say, “Awe, I think Tiger wants a back stroke”. Nope, I want you to move that stinky poo out of my litter. Your poo doesn’t hang around in the litter box to greet you the next time, does it?
“Awe,” Dad said to Mom. “Look, Tiger’s curious. He likes the fishy. Go ahead and play with it.”
“Jerod,” Mom said, looking half reproachful. “Don’t tell him to play with it. That’s not nice.”
“It’s what he’d do in the wild, isn’t it?”
“I’m not sure if cats play with fish. I think you’re thinking of bears.”
“Well, bears eat fish… hmm…” Dad said, looking a little less certain.
Suddenly, the orange mass in the jar moved. It actually MOVED.
I backed away. Ew, ew, ew. It moves!
“Come on, little Tiger,” Dad said in a ridiculous baby voice. “Come on and play with the fishy. But don’t eat the fishy.”
Woah, ew. So he actually got me this weird floating mass of orange and thinks I’d eat it. The thing is literally floating in the water. It has black magic written all over it. What floats in the air? Nothing!
Dad stroked my back, which felt good, and I arched my back into his hand. But seriously. No amount of cat bribing or cajoling was going to get me anywhere near this fishy thing. I cautiously raised my paw above the water to appease him and to hopefully swat the thing silly if it tried to come close to the surface, but it didn't. After a moment, I lowered my paw and tried to slink off.
Dad laughed. “Ha, I guess Tiger’s not interested in her. Crazy, I thought the cat would be all over the fish.”
Mom laughed. “Ah well.”
Really. Couldn’t they have figured this out before he got the black magic wielding floating monster?
I was about to go lay down in the sunny spot on the floor when I froze.
“Psss….” A soft voice was calling and I knew it wasn’t either Mom or Dad.
Slowly, incredibly slowly to not freak myself out any more than I already was, I turned toward the fish bowl. Now that Mom and Dad were not paying attention, the fish had stopped swimming aimlessly and was against the end of the glass staring directly at me.
“Pss… I’m not scary. And I’m not magical. If I was, do you think I’d be in this jar?”
My ears perked up slightly. Probably not, but maybe she was using black magic to make me think that!...
“Can you come closer, please? I have a very loud voice, but I’m about one-hundredth the size of you so it's really straining to yell.”
Was it a trap? I flexed my claws against the carpet, which stuck like Velcro, and then made the mistake of trying to walk toward the little fish and got stuck in place. I nearly fell on my face. I heard a soft tinkling noise and realized the fish was laughing, tiny bubbles emitting from her tiny mouth. Embarrassed, I walked closer and closer, still cautious. My tail twitched, probably a little fluffier than usual.
“How do I know you’re not magical?” I said.
“I can’t float outside of water,” the fish shot back. “And you could float in water if you tried. Have you ever tried?”
“Well, no…” The idea of spending even a second in water, let alone one’s whole life, seemed terrible. I started to feel bad for the fish. Poor thing. What type of monster did Dad think he was to trap her in water for all this time? I started to think of ways to knock the fishbowl onto the floor to watch it shatter. Maybe… I walked closer.
Suddenly, things seemed very different than they had when Dad first brought her in. The water made her look beautiful. She had little paper thin fins that seemed to glide and ripple effortlessly through nothing, and her side was a deep red gold made up of hundreds of little arched scales that changed colors slightly as she moved. My eyes grew wider and wider and I slowly, slowly brought my face closer to the glass, losing sight of everything other than the fish. It was beautiful, still a little strange, but pretty and unlike anything I’d ever seen. I think our noses touched. At least mine touched the glass, and I think hers did too.
“I'm Lily,” she said.
“Lily… I’m Tiger. Welcome home.”
Next > Episode Two: Socks and Shoes
